IN THE PALM OF MY HAND

Not long ago a friend of mine asked what I felt the first time I actually held the proof of my book in my hands.  That is a difficult question to answer.  It is because there was such emotion that I find it hard to describe in mere words.  To really understand, it would take many pages to share what and how the book came to be.

I chose Life Goes On for many reasons.  I wanted to be able to do more than publish a book.  I wanted to see a dream come true.  I wanted to be able to reach out to others and let them see this and know that they can make their own dreams come true if they are willing to work hard and never give up.  I wanted to find a way to design a cover that could be special.  This is something that I had created from cover to cover and all that is in between.

Many years ago as we traveled and headed home, there blazed across the sky a sunset so intense that it took the breath away.  Gazing across the sky, it appeared the heavens themselves were afire.  We stopped the car and took a picture of it before we continued our journey.  No picture could equal the site, but the memory and feeling persisted through the years remembering what beauty often surrounds us in so many ways.

I chose that old photo and decided to try to turn it into a cover that would wrap around the entire book from front to back.  The title of Life Goes On is in the sky.

There are so many people that are and have suffered so many things in their lives.  Many have lost their jobs, savings, and even their homes.  There are personal problems and family problems and we often can feel overwhelmed and alone.  As I wrote this book I wanted the characters to seem real and come to life.  I wanted people to know them and love them or hate them but feel with them or for them.  I want it to be  more than just a story in a book.  I want it to be the story and the book is a story of it’s own.

I wanted to feel and see and hold it before I went in for the surgery.  I had most excellent doctors and medical care, but have been sick.  I have also had other health problems and even know what it feels like to not be able to wake up after surgery and exist on life support because you are no longer able to even breathe for yourself.  I feared that I had run out of time and the days were numbered.

The company I chose to self publish was and is CreateSpace.  I knew so little about all there is to do to make this become a real book but they worked patiently with me.  I could not wait to see the printed proof.  I had done the digital proof and knew that the actual book was on it’s way to my house.

I got so tired so easily by that time.  I did not even hear the truck that brought it up to the house but my husband went and got it for me.  He smiled with me as he handed the package to me.  At first I could not open it.  I held it in my hands knowing that it had finally arrived.  It was finally a real book and I held it in my hands.

I slid the book out and saw the detail of the sky ablaze with color and the tiny headlights of the travelers on the road.  It was real.  It was a dream held before me in my hands.  I had not words to say what I felt but the tears of joy that glistened in my eyes told it all.  Dreams really can come true if we never give up and are willing to try.  I am still trying and not going to give up…not today.