Plan for Mother's Day

I am still going slow and at times not going at all, but every day is special and I am excited about today.  It is Mother's Day. My daughter has always made sure I felt special on this day and then she too became a mother and gave me a most wonderful gift any mother can get when she had her own son, my grandson. 

In a few hours we will get together and go pick flowers.  We could have bought a beautiful bouquet but these flowers can not be bought.  Every year for as long as I can remember my father would go pick iris from their flower beds and add in wild flowers of all kinds making delicate contrast in the bouquet.  They both love those flowers.  I have heard how when they were first married my great grandmother dug up bulbs to share from her own flower beds.  The little blue ones with the strongest sweetest scent are the ones and they still grow, bloom and slowly spread.  There are some from my grandmothers on both sides and there are those they picked out together.

They are both facing life threatening illness now.  These days have been so heartbreaking and difficult.  She is laying in a hospital bed now facing a surgical heart procedure tomorrow that has us all so worried.  We are all going to go visit and spend mother's day together at the hospital.  Her son, my brother is bringing pizza that she loves.  Daddy can not go pick her flowers for the first year as he too has had to live in an assisted living place and try to regain his own health as much as he can.  He will smile shortly.  They will both have their flowers.

We are going to get the iris and wildflowers and bring them to them along with their granddaughter and great grandson.  They have both been such a blessing and are always there for all of us.  Albert made sure I have the oxygen I need and we will soon be out picking flowers.

I want to wish everyone everywhere a happy Mother's Day.  In our lives, in our hearts, in our memories we hold mothers dear.  With each little flower I hold in my heart my own mother, daughter, grandmothers and great-grandmothers and wishes for all the others everywhere.

 I want to add in some photos of the flowers we picked today and took to my mother and father at the hospital. It was a wonderful day.

Bringing Memories Home

In my last blog I told about my family going to a place I remembered from my childhood and from many visits through all of the years.  There was, and if I am honest, is a certain sadness that I am unable to go on an outing right now such as this.  That sadness could not bloom into something bad as my husband, daughter and grandson took the time to take pictures and bring back such stories told with enthusiasm sharing with me the memories of the day.  They brought the memories home.

I looked at the pictures and it is still so beautiful.  When I saw the water flowing over the dam I could remember not only the sight and sound as it literally roared with the power of such massive amounts of water flowing, but you can feel it.  You can feel the cool radiate from the cold spring water and feel the low rumble feeling of the power of the water.  The sound is almost a roar and the site is awesome.

The actual spring is 70 foot below the surface of the water you see as you enjoy the view.  It forms a large pond with a color rarely seen.  The water is so crystal clear but also so very deep it has a magnificent color of blue to it.  

 The massive amounts of water flowing through from the pond and then over the dam make a display of sparkling patterns and diamond like reflecting shimmers exploding below as it rushes on to make the Spring River.

I guess in some ways I see things differently from some.  We all do that in our own way.  When we would go up into the hills of the Ozarks in the Fall I would often get so excited seeing the colors of the trees.  There are times I would look at the bare branches of trees in the winter and see beauty as they created patterns against the sky.  I might see a tree with and interesting twist to the form of the branches.  I might look up through the trees and appreciate the canopy formed by the living branches and leaves above. 

When I looked through the pictures I found one from the view below looking up through the tree leaves.  I had to smile as I knew my daughter had been thinking of me and there was a tree picture for momma.

 

My daughter laughs as she remembers more than one occasion when I would gasp pointing,  “Look at that.  Look!”

She seemed puzzled and would ask what in the world I was looking at.  I would point to a tree that seemed almost ablaze with color and say,  “That tree….it is so beautiful.”

In a forest of trees I am so excited as I see a tree.  There are times we forget to look for the tree as all we see is the forest.  There are so many little things in life that are so beautiful.

Sitting under the huge limbs of an old tree, enjoying the shade and view I have often noticed some weed growing near by.  At first glance it really is a weed but if we look closer they often have some tiny little flowers that are the most delicate and beautiful sites.

The look of excitement in the eyes of my grandson as he reels in a fish or sees all of these sights for the first time would be a site of beauty.  I did not have to completely miss these things.  When they got home he was filled with such excitement as he could not wait to tell of his adventures.  My daughter and husband had smiles and tales to tell of all of the things seen and done for the day and pictures to go with it.

When those we love show their love in return by taking such joy in making me feel a part of the day and the memories it is something not to be missed.  When others take the time to not only share but to include and show love we need to take the time to see what it really is they are doing.  Each one of the pictures is a moment captured to bring home and share.

When they got home the excitement of the day was still with them.   The idea of a bonfire came to life.  The end of a perfect day shared in the last moment of daylight as darkness surrounded and the time to tell each story of their adventures.   Tales told around the fire ended a perfect day for all.  (It also cleans up any limbs that need to be picked up in a really fun way)

Bringing Home Memories and the memories of those we love.  I hope you each and every one have a wonderful day and create some wonderful memories to share with someone you love.

What Do I Want To Be When I Grow Up

Linda Bales

When I grow up I would like to be able to able to say that I lived my life as best I could.  I would like to say that I had the courage to live it honestly and the integrity to make it my lifestyle.  I would like to say I had determination to stand up for what I believed is right and protect and provide.  I would like to say I was a good person and have it be true. 

Now if you knew how old I am, you might laugh…..But…. we can spend a lifetime trying to be what our heart knows we should be.  I am trying my best.

Now I want to tell you about a friend.  My friend has touched the lives of so many.  My friend is all that I described above and more….so much more.

Not everyone I meet is a friend.  We may even get along, but a friend is special in your heart.  My friend touched my heart and does to this day.  Every time I think…..  I think of how many other lives this one woman touched that are so much better for having known her.  I think of how many lives she influenced by the example and life that she led.  I think of how many smiles, laughter and memories live forever in the hearts of others because of her.  I think……   I think of the passion in her voice and the light that shone from her eyes when she spoke of her family.  God knows she loved her family.

I do not use that as an expletive or common phrase.  I used the term “God knows” because he does.  And it makes him smile…I am sure.

This woman who is my friend, and is one that I am sure God Knows and it makes him smile.   She reached out and touched so many.  Some say “Linda, was our Park Ranger… and she was that and so much more.  She maintained the business of operations of the State Park but would still take the time to visit with a smile with interest an enthusiasm of all.  She really reached out.

She shared love and encouragement, honesty and integrity and hope.  She was many things to many people but one things she was to all is ....Special.  When you have met someone like Linda Bales…You met someone special…….

LOOKING BACK

LOOKING BACK

Many years ago we went on a family vacation.  One of the things I enjoyed was riding on as real old time steam engine.  There is a place in northern Ark where you can ride the train that is now used to give tourist the opportunity to experience the sights, sounds, and feelings from the past and occasionally they use it making movies.

My parents had given me a camera and explained to only take special pictures and make each one the best that you can.  I understand now it is to help prevent me from taking every and any picture I could click and later they pay to develop pictures of floors and other strange things.

The years had passed, but I still had the little camera and used it to take many memorable pictures for me and my family.  This trip was filled with wonderful moments shared with not only my children but parents and Grandfather.  He was an amazing man of heart, soul, and a gift of sharing with others.  Riding on an old fashioned steam engine train brought back memories for him and he began to share the tales from the past.  They had a man who told interesting facts about many things including the train.  The shock and amazement on his face would have made a fantastic picture but I was shocked at the same time.

The seats were all facing the front of the train.  My Grandfather slid his hand down touching the ornate bracket on the seat, asked me to sand for a moment and like magic the seat back rotated to face the opposite direction.  I thought he had broken the antique seat as ……did the tour narrator judging by the expression on his face.

Grandpa laughed and explained that many of the runs went from town to town and back in those days.  They did not want to try to turn every car around for the return trip and the people would not want to all ride facing backwards.  The hinged seats were the answer.  He went on to explain about many things he remembered as a very young child.  Everyone in the passenger car listened and was smiling as he shared the memories of the past.  You could almost see the little boy who had gone with his father who was the conductor. 

It was a day filled with wonder and shared memories.  Of all the pictures there is one that I would like to share.  At one point I went to the back of the train and stood on the little area at the back of the caboose.  I took my picture as the track faded into the distance.  I could almost hear and feel the time fade into the past and heard the echoes of the stories I had heard from my grandfather and great-grandfather.

Now as I grow older I have found myself often viewing times past in life.  At family reunions as a child I would often hear the OLD” folks say….”I remember when…” and “Back in my day we…” and so on.  Now when I go to gatherings and sit back and listen…we the children of the past are saying….”I remember when….and  Back in my day….”  I have to smile.

 In my heart I still keep a spot for that child that took such delight in the intricate beauty of a delicate blossom of a wild flower or the fluttering beauty of a butterfly.  I still like to play with playdoh and only wish I could run, walk go out and about and enjoy the beauty and wonder that surrounds us in nature.

I am not done.  I may be getting older but I am not yet old….(Except on some days when it seems almost to difficult to go on)  There are also those days.  I have often talked about not giving up and that we should keep trying.  I fully believe all of those things and more but there are also times that are so hard, and painful, and filled with emotions that seem dark and filled with despair. 

At those times I tend to look back at many things.  I look back to when I could walk and run and play all day.  I can remember but not quite feel the excitement at being alive….  They I remember special people in my life and good times that seemed so magic.  Memory can be a double edged sword because so many of those I loved are gone from me now.  So many I trusted, betrayed and some that I tried to help, took advantage.  Hopes and dreams that seemed so bright faded with time or evolved from dreams into nightmares. 

That is a dark place emotionally to be.  If I stayed there long I would not be long for this world.  I really believe that what is in our minds and hearts greatly affects our health.  We have to be alive in our hearts and souls to be alive in our lives.  More than our physical mortality is a living death of life with no purpose.  I ask why am I still here?  What am I supposed to do?  What good am I to anyone?  There are times I am so sure I am nothing but a burden to all around me.  I feel more tolerated than loved and wonder if life is really worth working so hard to continue.  The day I decide to go on in the next life, all I have to do is quit working and trying so hard to go on.  What good am I to anyone?

Well….I do not have all of the answers.  I can say things that I think and feel and hope that in someway it might help another to know they are not alone.  If it even helps one person…then I did have a purpose.  I do not share these things here to make myself feel better.  Some say that writing helps to work out our problems.  I love to write and would no matter what but posting them for the world is no help for me….it is my way to share…me.  If I can share things that might touch another or even for a moment help them to think or feel better it is worth it.

 Life can be so busy we forget to take the time to really look.  Do we really look around us?  No matter what is going on, there is beauty all around us.  We can marvel at the beauty of a sunrise or blazing sunset that paints the sky.  We can appreciate the delicate beauty of a flower or butterfly.  We can take the time to see the excitement in a young child, or the magical affects of their smiles, laughter or loving touch of their hand in yours.

Life can be so difficult and painful but it is also a gift.  What we do with that is our choice.  I want to be able to reach out to others and hopefully make a positive difference.  I want to have a voice and know I do not sit here alone in silence.  I want to live and be alive every day of my life.  I would like to see others take heart, hope and not give up.  Believe.  We have to believe.

In the things that I have published and will publish I am trying to share.  I want to write the best stories possible to allow the reader to sit back and see, feel and be there.  I want each and every story to be one they will enjoy and remember.  Accomplishing the feat of making my simple words into books is sharing my dream.  It is a dream you can hold in your hand and share with a friend.  It is a dream to see the cover and enjoy all that is between front and back. 

Each of my covers is also something I share.  The first is from a photo I took over 20 years ago.  The second is one of my paintings.  The children’s book is pastels and charcoal in all of the illustrations and cover that I did.  The one I am doing next I will have to see what I can come up with.  I hope you enjoy these things I share and also that it might touch you in some way.  I pray it might make a difference. 

I will not give up…not today.  I do believe….in many things.  I hope you have a wonderful day filled with smiles, laughter, and dreams that can come true….and pass it on to others.

I hope you stop by and see the books and information at Amazon or the many other sites.  You can ask at any bookstore too.

http://www.amazon.com/Linda-Nance/e/B004PVDVR4/ref=sr_ntt_srch_lnk_1?qid=1326982811&sr=1-1

  If you get time to stop by the fan page I set up I shared many things there and would love to hear your comments. 

https://www.facebook.com/pages/Linda-Nance-Fan-Page/162224753802546

FATHERS….DADS….POP…DADDY….GRANDFATHER…

WE LOVE YOU

There is so much I would like to write for father’s day.  I decided to look for some photos that I could share and the memories flooded my soul.  They brought with them smiles and warmth to the heart as I viewed the moments captured and knew the stories of each one.  We all have our memories and special moments to cherish. 

There are also memories that bring sadness and even a tear as we miss those so dear to our hearts or remember times so long gone by that are so distant from us now.  Even in the sadness we can take comfort knowing and remembering the love shared and times together.  Those are things of the heart and heart and love never dies.  If there is love there is something within that will be there forever.

There have been many years pass since I wrote a little poem for my father.  I have decided to share it here.  It may not be the best or most well written but it is from my heart and I hope it is something that will have meaning.  I wish that each and every one of you could know my father.  He has lived his life….He really has.  He lives loving and sharing with his family and others he might meet.  He reaches out to others and has and had a zest for life.  He taught us, cared for us and shared the joy of living as we grew.  He gives so much to everyone around him. 

Every photo I viewed brought so many memories and stories I wish I could share.  Daddy is special.  This is for him…..and…..

I want to take the time to mention all of our fathers.  Albert has been there for us and the grandchildren.  He reaches out to others to care and help.  He shows in the life he leads what it is to be special.  No one or thing in life is perfect but he strives to build and grow creating memories for the future that we may cherish.  The little children smile in delight as he takes the time to play, share, teach and not only talk to them but listen to them with heart as well as ears.  He takes the time.

Now to salute the next generation who work so hard to face life and are now the children of memories and daddies of today.  Jason, Carl, and Albert…we hope that you know our love and respect as you work to do so much.  You protect, provide, and do so much more.  You teach love in the love that you show.  You take the time to listen and care.  You are Daddies and we love you.  You will still however be our kids.

I will try to write more but for now close with this thought…Daddy…..We love you.